I’m a therapist—why adults should never stop making new friends

While many people focus on maintaining a handful of close friendships, mental health experts say continuing to form new connections can be just as important for well-being.

According to a 2023 Pew Research Center survey, 53 percent of adults say they have between one and four close friends, while 38 percent have five or more. However, 8 percent report having no close friends at all.

Rebecca Boone, a licensed mental health counselor, told Newsweek that meaningful interactions help people regulate emotions, build resilience during stressful periods and lessen the effects of chronic isolation.

“We often think of friendship as a social luxury, but clinically it’s much closer to a protective health behavior,” Boone said.

Loneliness is a widespread issue that can affect anyone, regardless of age, income or where they live. According to Forbes, 58 percent of Americans report feeling lonely on a regular basis.

The health effects can be significant: Harvard Magazine has compared the increased mortality risk linked to loneliness to smoking 15 cigarettes a day, while the U.S. Department of Health reports that loneliness raises the risk of heart disease by 29 percent, stroke by 32 percent and dementia by 50 percent in older adults.

A lack of social connection is also associated with a more than 60 percent higher risk of premature death.

“Interactions provide emotional co-regulation, increase resilience during stress, and reduce the physiological burden of chronic isolation,” said Boone, the clinical director at Woodlands Grove Recovery Campus in Ohio.

While staying connected to existing friends is valuable, Boone explained that forming new relationships can offer unique benefits for personal growth and mental well-being.

Boone said the brain naturally prefers familiar routines and patterns because they require less energy. New friendships interrupt those automatic habits by introducing people to different viewpoints, lifestyles, cultures and experiences. This exposure creates what Boone described as healthy cognitive “friction,” encouraging learning, self-development and new ways of understanding the world.

“It’s one reason people often describe new friendships as energizing—they’re literally inviting the brain to form new connections instead of recycling old ones,” she said.

How Expanding Your Circle Can Prevent Stagnation

According to Boone, feeling stagnant is not always the result of low motivation. In many cases, it can stem from a lack of novelty and fresh experiences.

Relationships naturally introduce new conversations, activities and ways of thinking, which can help people break out of repetitive routines. Boone said expanding a social circle does more than add contacts—it can open people up to opportunities and possibilities they may not have previously considered.

By broadening someone’s social world, new friendships can also broaden “the number of possible futures” their brain is able to imagine for itself.

The Value of Different Perspectives

Boone said one of the lesser-known benefits of diverse friendships is their ability to strengthen psychological flexibility—the ability to adapt beliefs and perspectives when presented with new information.

Interacting with people from different backgrounds encourages curiosity, perspective-taking and resilience when facing unfamiliar situations. These friendships can help people become more comfortable navigating discomfort rather than avoiding it.

“Every time we engage with someone whose experiences differ from our own, we’re exercising the neural pathways involved in curiosity, perspective-taking, and distress tolerance,” Boone said.

She added that personal growth often comes from learning that discomfort and safety can exist at the same time.

“Diverse relationships become a real-world practice ground for that skill,” she said.

Signs You May Need More Social Connections

Boone said the warning signs of loneliness are not always obvious. Rather than simply spending time alone, people may begin to build their identity around isolation.

Potential signs include:

• Frequently telling yourself, “I’m just a loner.”
• Believing, “I don’t need people.”
• Feeling you always do better on your own.
• Avoiding opportunities to connect after past disappointments or hurt.
• Becoming increasingly withdrawn from social activities.
• Feeling isolated but struggling to reach out for support.

Boone noted that chronic loneliness can gradually narrow a person’s world, making them less likely to seek connection at the very moment they may need it most.

“The goal isn’t simply to have more people in your life,” Boone said. “It’s to build relationships that challenge you to grow while making you feel safe enough to be fully yourself.”

Contact Newsweek editors on this story: Charlotte Nisbet and Tony Phillips